What everything still looks like: Mourning against the wrath of a blinding communist

I still feel extremely lied against, cheated, raped, robbed in many ways. This has been a long term suffering. People can claim that have understanding of freedom and what it is to be controlling or a sore loser but the truth of action in real life is not there. Of all the extreme ways I get man-hunted, interrogated, and yelled at, it's still not the same civility on both ends and I've never made it my job to be a man-hunter/interrogator. Of course, this is all another impossible thing to say with the current protesting crisis. I have to keep my enslaved crying tears and thoughts to myself. Blogging doesn't entirely keep it to myself but I have never forced anyone to read my blogs. I got to be sensitive but my truth that has always been interrupted in some ways or another is still there..... I'm so mad that I don't get related with or recognized enough. I've hated being stalked and unknown in many aspects but I also hated being forced into being someone's blow up doll because they don't know what it means to face a person and have any grit. They force you to be whatever they want you to be because it works for them and is convenient for them. Do they ever get scolded for their rape and lies and forceful actions the ways I get man-hunted to my face?! Why doesn't someone recognize when a person wants to be called my know it all master and giving theirself some certain credits? How do people not seem to recognize or understand how much of a provocation and threat it is against me when a person treats theirself as my "Master," and give their self the credit of having me and understanding what it is to have me? How can someone not see how serious and severe of a crime it is to kill me with a "Master" gesture? What is not to get about my anger? Not in the worse unfair uncivil way. I am raped to my face. I am grossly ignored to my face. Some men just don't understand the quitter I never was to my anger. Like being forced to be a lesbian was going to relieve me of my anger; they've always been their worst arrogant fool and I've been ignored for years with them giving their self credit like they are the answer to my problem. And this is one example of the insufferable cheated and lied against mishad and raped victim I am. Men typically never take the fall for their actions and they won't be taken with two sides of the story actions. They avoid and make things worse by disguising one issue to another issue ONLY FOR ME TO FUCKING COME BACK TO THE SAME ISSUE LATER LIKE I'VE NEVER HAD ANY ISSUES AND LIKE I'VE NEVER EXISTED. THE CHEATING ROBBERS KEEP ME IGNORED. ON TOP OF THAT MEN TYPICALLY DON'T HAVE THE DECENCY TO RECOGNIZE AND/OR ADMIT TO HOW HATEFUL AND HOW MUCH OF A JEALOUSY IT IS TO KEEP A WOMAN MISTREATED THE WAY THEY DO. EVERYTHING IS MISALIGNED. Some have more of a grit but they remain way too dominant and still won't have enough of an understanding with the way they stay way too dominant. They make me feel so unwanted and rejected with what they put me through and while I can't change my feelings of despair and feeling jaded, they won't stop keeping things worse when they want to push me into a lesbian blow up doll. I was possessed to be wasted and I can't save myself. I hate the way there is a hateful communist always wanting to stand in my way and get in my face somewhere for me to be the same insufferable victim. They are such a sore loser for their dominant compliment. They can't be anymore of a Gadaffi than that.